Posts Tagged ‘Dallas Relationships’

The “Rules” of Revenge

Posted by    |    December 1st, 2011 at 6:00 am

The scariest, most disgusting word in a relationship is ‘cheater’.  It is the angel of death to any relationship. The cheater becomes a “murderer of love” (as said in Dan in Real Life) who kills everything that the relationship stood for.  No matter what the person says or does (or buys, for that matter); it’s over and nothing can be done to fix it. If you can’t tell, I have a pretty firm stance on this subject.

Luckily, I have never been in a relationship with a cheater, but I have seen its effects first hand on my close friends. After you find out, you begin to doubt everything. Did he really love me? Did he really want to be with me? Did he really think that I would be ok with this? After the initial shock wears off, the next thought process is, ‘How can I make them pay?’ When asked what I would do if in their position, I say (without thinking): hit them where it hurts. And hard.

In Tom Daley’s short film, Rules of the Game, this is exactly what main character Henry does after he learns that his fiancée is cheating on him with his best friend. Henry contemplates what he can do to get back at them. He considers simply breaking up with the fiancée, and exposing the infidelity at the wedding. Daley keeps the viewer guessing what Henry will do.

Whether or not you have been a victim of cheating, this short film tugs at your heart and shows that maybe you shouldn’t always take the high road.

Apologizing Means You Value Your Relationship More Than Your Ego…

Posted by    |    September 19th, 2011 at 11:15 am

Why is it so hard to say “I’m sorry’?  Two simple words, but they carry more weight than obese model Susanne Eman. I don’t know why we struggle with it so much, but it starts from the time we are small when we take something that doesn’t belong to us or we hit some other kid.  Our parents beseech us to to apologize (or encourage it with a wooden spoon, a switch from the backyard, or a taut leather belt,) but we still want to put up our defenses and ignore our wrong.  Or perhaps we haven’t actually done the deed with which we are accused, but it would squash the matter nonetheless if we would just ante up and say “sorry”.  I can only surmise that the blame for blamelessness falls squarely on ego.  Who wants to look weak, wrong, or repentant?  We want to hold all the power, and saying “sorry” is like saying we are waving a white flag forever.  When it comes to relationships, though, we’re almost always better off being the first to say it than to wait it out like a stubborn sea captain.  After all, how many of our arguments will even be on our minds and radars five years from now?  From personal experience, I’d say slim to none.

If you haven’t seen Table 7 by Texan filmmaker Marko Slavnić (by way of Bosnia, that is,) you need to give this fun and heart-warming short film five minutes of your time.  As we watch a couple on the brink of destruction, Slavnic shows us how a simple apology may be all we need.

Hilary Kennedy is a contributing author for www.youplusdallas.com, focusing primarily on Style, Arts and Entertainment, and Dating and Relationships.  Hilary also stars in many videos for YouPlusMedia and has her own show, The Hilary Kennedy Show.

Foolishly Seeking True Love: Dallas Edition

Posted by    |    August 29th, 2011 at 7:00 am

 

Written and directed by Jarrett Lee Conaway and produced by Graciela Muriada-del Toro, Foolishly Seeking True Love is a little more than three minutes of charm, cleverness, and beauty. This pair’s vision of a love story unfolding in a small window of time is impeccably executed, stemming from how hard it can be to date in L.A.  (It isn’t much easier here in Big D, unfortunately.) According to the writer, “That whole notion of true love and love at first sight, it just seems in the city people act like that’s a naive thing, like it can’t happen. But I kind of wanted to have something that was kind of like this magical realism, kind of a piece about love in modern cities.” (more…)

Love Is A Choice

Posted by    |    July 14th, 2011 at 3:48 pm

photo credit: blushless.comWhen it comes to relationships everyone has a choice. That’s why when it gets down to the nitty gritty that links two people there is a decision to make. Do I love you because I have to or because I want to?

Many people take the idea of “love at first sight” or “we were meant for each other” to believe that they have no say in what to feel about a person – but that’s never the case.

We’ve all hit that wall with a loved one. Everyone knows the story. Man says something stupid, doesn’t know it. Fight ensues. Or woman makes a comment, sends man into defense. Fight ensues. (more…)

Does Lasting Love Exist? Ask These Two.

Posted by    |    June 28th, 2011 at 11:19 am

When it comes to true love, the long-lasting, “sitting on the front porch next to you when we’re eighty” kind of love, there isn’t a lot of inspiration to go on these days.  Break-ups and make-ups abound, and when someone as hot and funny as Jennifer Aniston can’t keep a steady boyfriend, the rest of us don’t feel like we have much of a chance.  When I start to feel a little cynical about love and think the days of passionate, romantic, make you crazy kind of love no longer stands the test of time, I take a look at these two.

 

Meet John and Johnette Jackson.  Yes, those are their real names: John and Johnette. They met when he was 19, she was 20.  (She always brags she married a younger man.)  He went into the soda fountain where she worked and ordered a chocolate coke.  He came back the next day with two women from his work to size her up and see if she might be a good prospect for a date.  Turns out they thought she looked worthy, so he did.  She accepted, but on the eve of their first date, she decided she didn’t know enough about him to go on a date alone with this new stranger, so she went out with another fella.  Realizing he’d been stood up, John went driving around. Lo and behold, he sees Johnette out at the movies. With the other guy! What are the odds? Now, most men would seeth with anger and probably have a few choice words muttering under their breath.  Not John Jackson. He was a glutton for punishment, and found himself right back at the soda fountain the next week asking her out again.  Johnette likes to say he knew a good thing when he saw it.

After six months of dates and countless black cows later (it’s a fancy name for a root beer,) they married at a pastor’s house on June 27th, 1942.  John borrowed $5 from his dad to pay the minister.  Johnette wore a white eyelet dress and bright red heels, and there was no wedding cake, no honeymoon, no dancing.  Just two people who barely knew each other, getting married and about to face three years apart when John was sent to Guam in WWII.  Fast forward 69 years later, and they are still together, every single day.  With a shared love for the Lord, Wendy’s chicken nuggets, and laughter, these two are a quirky inspiration.  Two vastly different personalities, two different humors, two different temperaments…and yet, somehow these two made it work beautifully.

 

I have a confession.  John and Johnette are my grandparents, and yesterday was the celebration of their 69th year together.  We staged a funny vow renewal on the lake, complete with bouquet, tuxedo t-shirt, and psuedo-minister.  They recited their vows one more time, with the same love, humor, and joy they did almost seven decades ago.  (You’d have to have a sense of humor if you’re reciting wedding vows with a tuxedo t-shirt pinned to your chest.)  After declaring their love and John kissing the bride, they happily ate celebratory dinner and enjoyed their very first wedding cake.

 

Moments like these make you wonder: Can true love last a lifetime?  John and Johnette make it look so easy, though they’ll tell you it hasn’t always been and still requires a lot of sacrifice and patience.  And tuning your spouse out when they tell the same joke for the 1,000th time…..like, “Money can’t buy you happiness. But it WILL let you enjoy your misery in a better part of town!”

I don’t know about you, but I want to be celebrating something like this in seven decades.  I think Jennifer Aniston still has a shot at it, and all the rest of us do, too. Here’s to true love!

REAL WOMEN

Posted by    |    March 6th, 2011 at 2:27 pm

I was reading the Sunday New York Times Magazine and, at the same time, working with an editor by e-mail on an article about the film Black Swan for a blog. It was then that it occurred to me that the article I was reading, B-Girl Bouillabaise, and Black Swan offer women several options on the road to their authenticity.

Many theatergoers leave the film Black Swan utterly confused, with more questions than answers. Others, like my friends, just didn’t care for its frightening images and “unnecessarily macabre” scenes.  I left the movie exhilarated and spent, because it breathtakingly articulates the most important relationship of a woman’s life: the one she has with herself. For me, it’s a heroine’s journey into womanhood, the internal/external struggle of the duality of women’s lives. How do we break the most delicate of bonds, leaving our mothers to become the authentic “us?”  How do we gracefully integrate the “nice” and “not-so-nice” aspects of who we really are, without refusing to be completely one or the other?  How much are we willing to sacrifice to achieve success? (more…)

Love What You See in the Mirror

Posted by    |    February 9th, 2011 at 2:50 pm

lips

Perfect Lips

The playwright, Neil LaBute, deftly delves beneath the surface with his trilogy of ‘beauty plays,’ all showing in rotation last spring at the Wyly Theater in Dallas. For the characters in the three plays, surface beauty harms both in its absences and presence. All three plays deal with society’s preoccupation with physical beauty: judgments made, spoken and unspoken; the subtle methods of manipulation around beauty; and how physical attributes are both asset and liability. Each play features four characters, consisting of two men and two women in their mid-twenties to early thirties involved some sort of romantic entanglement. The men are confined to archetypes: the Alpha Male, a rude, selfish prick with no morals or scruples; the Beta Male, a self-deprecating nebbish who knows good from evil but is too emotionally underdeveloped to choose what is right. The women are more nuanced: a slender blonde beauty unsure of why she is loved, a stocky yet beautiful brunette secure with her body, a career woman striving to be perfect, a demure sweet woman who defers to men, a plain woman who takes offense at being called “regular” rather than the ‘hot new thing’ in the office The dynamic among the four is endlessly fascinating and stimulates much discussion. (more…)