Friend Fallout

Posted by    |    August 8th, 2011 at 1:23 pm

Four strands of rope...“You’ve changed.”

Words that are often uttered amongst friends after the two groups realize the other isn’t the same anymore.

People naturally grow apart when there is no time or effort invested, and that’s because people honestly do change. Music, activities, likes/dislikes, preferences – everything – is cultivated by our surroundings and those in them.

So when one person spends less investment in one relationship and works – sometimes unintentionally – on others, friendships dwindle because the ability to have something in common becomes difficult to create.

In my case it was a group of friends whom I had been so close to since our early years of elementary school. Years of one-of-a-kind memories and inside jokes that can be recalled at a moments notice. But soon after college struck, and I began diving deeper into my life’s goals, a separation of the two began.

What started as missed hangouts and little communication led to not being included in routine events. It’s the subconscious act of inviting someone only to have them skip out or not be able to come so often that they are put out of mind automatically.

This neglect isn’t because of being unwanted, but because the investment isn’t there and now I’m on the outside of the solidified group. However, at the base of these friendships are relationships that cannot be brushed aside by typically inactivity, but are locked in forever.

I have recently decided to make an effort to work on my friendships. While that takes extra effort(driving around DFW) and sometimes puts me situations I’m not accustomed to (stomping at dubstep clubs), getting back in with my friends is important.

Realizing that I am different now and so are they has been a big step. I feel like I can get over the shock of how different our worlds have become and enjoy them for the people I’ve always known and loved.

So if a relationship is important, lock in time to be there and don’t make excuses. Things suffer when they’re not attended to.

Photo courtesy of stock.xchange

Tags: , , , , , , ,