Did that really just happen? Did the coolest, most star-studded event on the planet just melt down like a 13-year-old with a new crop of acne? Fifteen minutes into that painful exercise our whole Oscar-watching party slumped in disbelieving silence. No laughs. No energy. No electricity whatsoever. It was so bad on so many levels, and hopefully somebody somewhere has taken show producers Bruce Cohen and Don Mischner out back and administered punishment. A cattle prod comes to mind. Herewith, my comments on the car wreck that was the 83rd Academy Awards.
1. James Franco, keep your day job, even it requires you to cut your arm off. You are charming, handsome, talented, and perhaps the worst MC ever selected. Poor Anne Hathaway practically popped a hammy trying to keep the mood up and the pace lively. She set her career back five years trying to cook this turkey. (more…)